What do you mean by that?

As you get more involved with 4th Day Communities such as Tres Dias you will find that there are a lot of terms used to define the same things in different communities.

Here's just a short list of terms we use in Tres Dias (at least on Long Island, anyway) and what we mean by them. Note: this is how they are SPELLED correctly.

Palanca -- literally, a long plank of wood that is used to lift heavy objects, like a lever on a fulcrum. We use this term to describe the prayers, letters, and actions that help to lift a candidate closer to God. There are many kinds of palanca. Spiritual palanca is prayer, which may include fasting. Service palanca includes serving meals, setting up the Agape room, working on team, or watching your candidate's children while they are attending the Weekend. There is table palanca (given out at meals, left on the tables), general palanca (passed out in the Rollo Room usually with a general letter), and personal palanca (letters and small gifts, usually given directly to the candidates in their rooms, either left on their desk or on their bed; sometimes called bed palanca.)(Emmaus, Cursillo and Chrysalis use the term Agape)

Secuela -- periodic meetings of the Tres Dias Community, at least bimonthly, to share our 4th Day experience. They include food, worship, a 4th Day Speaker and small group sharings. (Emmaus: Gathering, Cursillo: Ultreya, Chrysalis: Hoot)

Candidate -- a person on a Weekend as a participant, not on team. (Emmaus: Pilgrim, Cursillo: Cursillista, Chrysalis: Caterpillar)

Pescador -- once a Candidate has completed a Weekend, s/he is a Pescador. Literally it means Fisherman, and since Jesus called His disciples Fishers of Men we use this term to mean anyone who has completed the Tres Dias experience. Plural is Pescadores, which rhymes with De Colores (pes-ka-door-ayz). (Emmaus: Pilgrim, Cursillo: Cursillista, Chrysalis: Butterfly)

Abrazo -- a big hug!

Agape -- the feast of love at the end of the Second Day (usually Saturday).

Mananita -- the serenading of the candidates by the community. In our tradition, the women sing to the men, and vice versa. This is traditionally Sunday morning.

De Colores -- a Spanish folk tune that became associated with Cursillo during its inception. It is sung to remind us of the roots of our Tres Dias movement, and to symbolize the ecumenical nature of our bonds. We use "De Colores" as a greeting. (Go Here to listen to De Colores in Spanish on YouTube.com)

Palancateer -- the designated person who prays continually during a Rollo, usually in a small prayer chapel set aside for this purpose.

Apostolic Hour--the Cross Presentation ceremony at the end of the Weekend.

I hope this little "glossary" helps answer any questions you may have concerning the "lingo" of Tres Dias.

If there are any other terms you need explained, or just want to know the correct spelling or pronounciation, please drop us a comment.

Hello? Hello? Can You Hear Me Now?

Sometimes the most frustrating thing about being a part of an organization is the feeling that no one is listening to you. There seems to be a disconnect between the members and the leadership. Have you ever wanted to send a suggestion to the board, but did not know whom to send it to? Well, we want to make it as easy as possible.

Here you go: we now have static email addresses for our local Secretariat. No matter who is in office, you will be able to contact Long Island Tres Dias' Secretariat by sending an email to these addresses. The people may change, but the email addresses won't. So you'll be able to contact your humble servants no matter who they are at the time.

Isn't that easy?

Here they are for Secretariat:

President litdpres@gmail.com
First VP litdvp1@gmail.com
Second VP litdvp2@gmail.com

Secretary litdsecretary@gmail.com
Financial Secretary litdfinsecretary@gmail.com
Treasurer litdtreasurer@gmail.com
PreWeekend Committee Chairperson litdpreweekend@gmail.com
Weekend Committee Chairperson litdweekend@gmail.com
Post Weekend Committee Chairperson litdpostweekend@gmail.com
Past Rector/Rectrix Committee Chairperson litdpastrects@gmail.com
International Representative litdinternational@gmail.com

For our subcommittees:
Applications  litdapplications@gmail.com
Newsletter    LISound4Jesus@gmail.com
Reunion Groups Coordinator litdreuniongrps@gmail.com
Prayer List  litdprayerlist@gmail.com
International Palanca Coordinator litdpalanca@gmail.com

We hope this change makes communication easier for everyone. Please feel free to email us with any questions or concerns (even compliments!) As always, comments on this blog are welcomed.

For more information, please go to http://www.litd.org/

Do I Really Need a Sponsor?

A prospective candidate asked me recently "Why do I need a sponsor? What does a sponsor do?" Good questions!

Christianity is unique among the world's religions because it is the only one that isn't based on what the worshippers do for God, but on what God did for His worshippers. He doesn't want our perfection; he wants our affection. It's all about the relationship!

Jesus came to build His church one person at a time. He spent three years in close relationship with a small group of friends, training them to spread His message. And they did--by going and forming relationships with others. God has chosen people (not angels) to spread the good news throughout the world. In Tres Dias we call this process "See a Friend, Be a Friend, Share Christ your Friend." In other words you bring your friends who don't know Christ to Him by sharing with them your friendship with Him. This is the essence of witnessing: we tell our friends, and they tell their friends, and so on...

It's the same in Tres Dias. We rely on pescadores to reach out to those in their Environments who want a closer walk with Christ and invite them to attend a Tres Dias Weekend. As an act of love, the pescador helps the candidate through the three phases of the Weekend: PreWeekend, Weekend, and Post Weekend.

PreWeekend: See a Friend.
The first phase begins with prayerful observation of your Environment. Who among your family and friends would be a good candidate for a Tres Dias? Are they seeking a closer relationship with Christ? Are they able to emotionally, spiritually and physically handle the weekend? Remember, the Weekend can be pretty intense, and we don't want to overload them!

Once you have approached someone with an application in hand, make sure you answer all questions honestly. Tres Dias' policy is full disclosure. THERE ARE NO SECRETS! Tell them all about the Essentials: the talks, breaks, chapel times, all the food, the music, times of prayer. Tell them that it is a very structured, cloistered weekend. Don't even hint that there are surprises to be unwrapped. Do warn them about being asked to put away watches & cellphones. Tell them to leave iPods and other such devices at home. You might want to warn them about the silence on Thursday night. The point is you should know your candidate well enough to know how best to prepare them for the Weekend.

Help them overcome obstacles if you can. For example: you might want to share the expense of the Weekend, or watch their kids, or prepare special foods if needed. Obtain palanca letters for your candidate too, even from family members who may not have made a Weekend.

Weekend: Be a Friend
The second phase is the Weekend phase. Your candidate needs a sponsor whom s/he can count on to be there on the outside of the Weekend to pray for him/her. Take care of your candidate's earthly needs...does the dog need walking? The kids need a drive to ballet or soccer practice? What about covering their Sunday School class? Showing up to the Mananita or serving a meal is important for the sponsor to do, too (You can't do these things if you are already at Montfort as part of the team, by the way. When you are not asked to serve on Team, then you are in the perfect position to Sponsor!). Oh and don't forget to come to Closing and bring your new pescador home.

Post Weekend: Share Christ Your Friend
This is probably the most important phase of Sponsorship--living the 4th day together. If your candidate is not already part of your Reunion Group, invite him to join you for at least a few meetings. Encourage him in his Piety, Study and Action. Bring him to the next few Secuelas, to the next Mananita, show him how to serve behind the scenes at the next Weekend (and for a man, his first opportunity will come quickly--the Women's Weekend is usually not more than two weeks away). Help him write short palanca notes and show him where to deliver them. (here's a handy reference guide to our Sponsoring Guidelines)

If you sponsor from your relationships then it won't be hard to remain in relationship after the Weekend. Remember, the Weekend is a tool. The Life in Grace, supported by the tripod of Piety, Study and Action, shared with others in a Reunion Group, is the main focus. Sponsoring our friends on a Tres Dias Weekend is just one Action we can take to share the love of Jesus with our world. Let's change our Environment, one heart at a time! (need an application? click here.)


Please tell us your sponsoring experience, or ask questions about sponsoring, in the comment section below. As always, anonymous comments are welcome.

Boot Camp April 2009

We had such a great time at Boot Camp in April. Although it was a beautiful day outside, quite a few of us gathered in the fellowship hall of Babylon Baptist church to discover more about Tres Dias and what makes it work. Let me start with a brief recap:

We started with worship, artfully led by Debbie DeCillis. There was a good balance of women and men musicians, a nice variety of instruments. We have such talent in our community! God has truly blessed us with an abundance of worship leaders.

Our President Lisa and 1st VP Lori presented the Statement of Belief, Essentials, and Dynamics of Tres Dias, along with some of the specific traditions that make Long Island Tres Dias unique. Questions were entertained (and entertaining!) and hopefully answered. After a bit of time was spent discussing Sponsorship and its responsibilities, we took time for dinner. Yum!

After dinner we were treated to the Essentials Edition of the Hollywood Squares. Nine of our well experienced Community members were willing to sit in the squares, and two brave souls were contestants. Thank you to our very capable MC, Jackie O'Connor (Post Weekend Chairperson). We learned some very interesting things about what is Essential to the Tres Dias method...(for the record, the term "bed palanca" refers to the letters and gifts that are addressed directly to a particular candidate and delivered to his/her bedroom and left on his/her bed/sleeping bag. In our case, we leave the pile of goodies on the desk in the room, since we don't usually know which bed is whose. That's why we don't use the term "bed palanca".) Personally, I can't wait for the next Boot Camp to see what else we'll learn!

The Boot Camp ended with several 'break-out' sessions, small workshops that pescadores could choose to attend. There were sessions for Table Leaders, Rollistas, Musicians, Potential Rector/Rectrix, Auxiliaries, and Potential Spiritual Advisors. Lots of learning went on that day, that's for sure!

The Secuela that followed was another wonderful evening filled with worship, friendship, and fellowship, as is usual in our Community. Thanks to our Fourth Day speaker, Chris Russo. Nicely done, Chris!

We would love it if you left a comment about what you learned at the Boot Camp, or if you have a suggestion for improvement (go ahead, you won't hurt our feelings). If you didn't attend, we'd love a comment from you as to what we can do to entice you to attend the next one. Door prizes? We'd love it if everyone who is a part of Tres Dias attends a Boot Camp at least once a year. Whether you were on Team for Weekend #1, or are a brand new pescador from Weekend #73, there is something for you at Boot Camp.

Why Can't We All Just Get Along?

Celebrating those things we have in common, and Respecting those that are different.

Once upon a time, there was Cursillo. It started as a Roman Catholic movement, and that was good. As more protestants attended the Cursillo, and the differences between the Catholics and the Protestants started to become an issue, it became clear that a Protestant version of the Cursillo needed to be created. And so Tres Dias was born. We are not rivals! We are sisters.

One of the great things about Tres Dias is that it is InterDenominational. That means that all Christian Denominations are welcomed to participate. It also means that non-Denominational and independent churches are welcomed. One big happy Christ-filled family, right? Well...

As siblings in real life have their different opinions and perspectives, so do the different sibling churches in Christ's family. Whether we are talking about Holy Communion or Holy Living we will have differences that can get our blood boiling. So how do we all get along?

Jesus said, "All will know you are my disciples by the love you show to one another" (yeah, I paraphrased it.) Our attitude towards each other is the key. We need to Celebrate those things we have in common, and Respect those which are different.

When you attend a Tres Dias event, you are asked to have three attitudes:
Idealism: an attitude that great things are possible.
Dedication: A spirit of openness to God and what He is asking of us, and a willingness to participate in the happenings of the Weekend.
Charity: A willingness to accept each other as we are, to have concern for each other, to listen and try to understand each other even though our opinions, attitudes and beliefs may be different. (Anybody remember this from the Thursday night Rector talk?)

This attitude of love (charity) is the key to getting along in Tres Dias. It is how we can celebrate what we have in common, and show respect those things which are different.

What's in common? How about the creed we proclaim at the Closing of each weekend? That's the starting point. (I believe it's the Apostles' Creed, but the Nicene Creed works just as well.)

How do we respect the differences? Hm...that's harder, especially since we are each convinced that we are RIGHT. But as Dr. Phil says, "You can either be right, or you can be happy." I vote for happy!

Stop the trash talk
Whether you are "just kidding" or totally serious in your criticism, you risk offending a precious brother or sister when you don't show respect for other perspectives. Please feel free to share your opinion, but try to do so in a way that doesn't force it onto anyone. And try not to make fun of or belittle someone else's opinion. If you are on the receiving end of such insensitive behavior please don't get offended. Just understand that they need to grow up too.

So let's stop all the Lutheran jokes, the Baptist riddles, the Catholic bashing, and the Pentecostal mocking. Be sensitive to others, but thick-skinned when it comes to hearing comments about your own group. Have a sense of humor!

Let Your Love Show
If you are not from a liturgical church, follow the written liturgy anyway without griping. If you prefer wine and wafers for Communion, eat the pita and juice without complaining. If you don't believe in (whatever, fill in the blank with your favorite pet peeve), and you hear someone say they do, why not just ignore it? If you have to respond, please choose a reaction of love, not of righteousness. After all, you are not here to correct them, you are here to love them. Their church can take care of correcting error in its ranks. Just show love and tolerance, and pray for them. The Holy Spirit is at work in their lives, and yours too. Let Him do His work. (Who made you Holy Spirit Jr.?)

Remember the Rainbow
From the Rector/Rectrix's book on Thursday night: "De Colores indicates the variety of colors and shades of belief which exist within our ecumenical Tres Dias movement. We celebrate what we have in common, and we respect those things which are different. God's total plan embraces many shades of beliefs. We are united by our common bond: that Jesus Christ is Lord." So remember the rainbow. One color does not a rainbow make. What if the red decided not to participate because the orange clashed with it? Or the purple was offended because it was called violet? Or the indigo felt slighted because it is ofttimes left out? How absurd! The Apostle Paul likened the Church to Christ's Body. The Body is one, but made up of many parts. The eye and the ear can't go to war, and the hand can't compete with the foot. That's equally absurd!

So we too need to embrace our Catholic sibs, our Baptist sibs, Lutheran, Reformed, Presbyterian, Methodist, Quaker...you don't really expect me to name them all, do you? Embrace those who are active in Cursillo, Walk to Emmaus, Chrysalis, Vida Nueva, or whatever. They are our brothers and sisters, co-laborers in Christ's kingdom, not our competition. Tres Dias should be the place where all of Christ's Body can come together and play nice. Let's do our part to make it so.

Whew! Was that can of worms squiggly enough for ya? All comments are welcome...just be respectful, please.

Where the Money Doesn't Go...

Now that you've seen where the money goes, we think it's important to mention where the money doesn't go.

No salaries. Secretariat members, committee members, and all support staff are volunteers. There are no expense accounts, and all reimbursements are supported by receipts and approved by the voting members of Secretariat.

No decorations. Except for a few balloons and streamers for the Agape Feast, all decorations are considered extras and must be donated as palanca. This includes those for the window and tables in the dining room, the break room, the door tags, the name tags, and the Weekend sign.

No frills. Candy for the Rollo Room, flowers for the dining room, hats/costumes for the Auxiliaries, photographer for the Weekend, placemats, table coverings, Scripture/trinkets on the table at meals, real flowers for the Mananita, etc...are all given as palanca each time.

No specialty foods. Sponsors are expected to make sure their Candidates bring any specialty food they need for their Weekend (ie allergen free, kosher or halal, low sodium or low carbohydrate, etc.). These items should be clearly labeled for the Candidate only.

No food Thursday night, or Break food, or snacks at Secuelas. All the food provided on Thursday night is optional, and is needed to be brought by Sponsors with their Candidates. The Team usually chips in and provides a large hero and beverages in order to make sure there is enough food for those attending the Weekend, but realize that this is palanca on their part. In addition, the Team is asked to bring two bottles of soda/juice with them to the Weekend as palanca. If beverages run out, the Chief Kitchen is given funds to meet that need. Break food is also palanca, but Secretariat does allow the Chief Kitchen to send out for some things to provide for a needed balance (prunes, for example!), and if there are no suitable items for the Mananita participants the Chief may send out for donuts or such. The special cake for Saturday night dessert is palanca too. Secuela snacks are 100% palanca, brought by those in attendance.

As you can see, without palanca we would have a very different Tres Dias experience! It is important to see that we all have a part to play in the support of each Weekend, from our physical presence (living Palanca) to our financial support, and our material support as well. Maybe you can't give your time or a scholarship, but maybe you can buy a bag of candy for the Rollo Room, or provide a basket of fresh fruit for the Break Room. What about a casserole for Saturday lunch? The possibilities are endless!!

Any questions? Did I miss something? Please leave a comment. Thanks!

Where Does The Money Go?

This post contains corrections and additions to the original text published in the Long Island Sound for Jesus, Jan 2009 edition.

What does the money we collect at Tres Dias get spent on?
Good question! Tres Dias could not exist without the support of pescadores like you who give so generously. You deserve to know where your money goes! Here is a breakdown of our annual expenses:

First, we pay for the Weekends. Recently we were asked, "What are our expenses for a Weekend, yearly?"

The cost of each set of Weekends (Men and Women make one set) goes beyond what the team and candidates pay directly to Montfort (currently $235/person, or $7,050 per team of 30, plus candidates' donations). The additional expenses of our Weekends are as follows:

Chiefs Money: Chief Aux and Chief Kitchen are given a total of $600 ($50 Aux, $100 Kitchen, per Weekend) to provide for items such as Communion needs, Thursday night and Sunday lunch tableware, beverages, break room needs, printing of address lists & 4th day packet items, Agape supplies. All purchases must be supported by receipts, and the leftover money goes back to the general treasury.

Bibles for the candidates $5-$6 ea.
Tres Dias Crosses for candidates $4.50 ea
Pilgrim's Guide $.80 ea
Closet Supplies $400- $500 per year (candles, tissues, matches, Rollo Room supplies: pencils, markers, poster paper, table covers, notebooks/paper/folders, tape, glue, chalk, helium, some balloons, ribbons, blank name tags, flashlights, batteries, etc.)

Spiritual Advisers (Montfort no longer waives their fee for Spiritual Advisers, however LITD continues to cover our own precious Spiritual Advisers): $1,880 per year
Candidate SCHOLARSHIPS for the Weekends $1,880 per year (2 men and 2 women per weekend)

GENERAL FUND: We also have other expenses, such as the yearly mailing of our newsletters and post cards $1000,00 per year
Secuela expenses:

DONATION TO HOST CHURCH ($50 per Secuela, if they accept it)

Secuela general supplies: coffee, tea, sweeteners, milk, paper goods

Printing of the newsletter $ 800 per year
International dues and support $ 240 per year

International Representative travel & lodging expenses to International Secretariat meetings held around the USA (varies, paid by reimbursement with receipt).
CCLI license $150 per year

As you can see the cost of a weekend can be up to $8-9,000 a year, depending on the number of candidates. That is why your palanca is so very important.

REMEMBER YOUR WEEKEND AND HOW YOU WERE IMPACTED.
WHAT A PRIVILEGE TO MAKE IT HAPPEN FOR SOMEONE ELSE.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR GENEROUS SUPPORT AND MAKING TRES DIAS POSSIBLE!

We want to encourage you to palanca part or all of the above items. You can send your donations marked PALANCA to the current Financial Secretary (please see the Secretariat list at http://www.litd.org/ for the current information). Please make all checks payable to Long Island Tres Dias.

Long Island Tres Dias is a non-profit organization, recognized as a 501(c)3 charity by the IRS.